My alarm goes off at either 5:45 or 6:00 am, depending on the day. Chances are good that I was up feeding Selah a few hours before that (thanks, four-month sleep regression). I stumble into the bathroom and pull myself together for the day. I feed Selah again while Dan cooks me breakfast (have I mentioned that he’s a saint?), triple check to make sure I have all my pump parts, kiss everyone goodbye, and then dash out the door. I work, come home, try unsuccessfully to get Selah down for one more nap, scrounge up dinner, do the bedtime routine, and fall asleep on the couch while Dan and I watch The Good Wife.
I wake up the next morning and do it again, possibly with a variation that includes more diaper changes, more nap-time battles, and less pumping when I work from home.
This season of my life isn’t dazzling or particularly fulfilling. I find deep joy in watching Selah grow, hearing her giggle, and snuggling her to sleep. But I’m definitely not bursting at the seams with creativity and zest, and at the end of each day, I often feel like I accomplished little.
In these mundane, routine-driven days, I try to give myself some space to dream. Even if I can’t act on many of these dreams right now, thinking about what could be in the future keeps my spark alive.
The future belongs to those who believe in the beauty of their dreams.”
These days, I’m dreaming of:
- Writing more frequently and posting more than once a week on this blog.
- A night of 8+ hours of consecutive sleep, and not feeling that low-grade sense of exhaustion all the time.
- Exploring new parts of the world with Selah and Dan.
- Christmas morning shortly after Selah turns one, when she’s wobbling around on her toddler legs and giving sloppy kisses.
- More children.
- Living on the same street as my best friends.
- Grilling fresh food and sitting on the patio as the sun sets.
- Writing a book.
- Getting a haircut and a massage (oh, the luxury!).
- Being debt-free.
- Feeling the sunshine warm on my skin at the cottage while I take Selah on her first boat ride.
- Living in a coastal community with a view of the water.
- The next season of House of Cards.
- Regular date nights with Dan.
- Family dinners and holiday meals around our coming-soon dining room table.
Some of my dreams are silly and small, while others are frighteningly big, and some are truly impossible. (We’ll probably never live on the water, but gosh, wouldn’t that be truly dreamy?)
It doesn’t matter too much how achievable these dreams are; just the act of dreaming helps me to remember that life won’t always be this monotonous, and that maybe someday, I’ll be vibrant again.When life is mundane, keep your spark alive by continuing to dream big. #dreams #goals Click To Tweet